An independent field handbook · Non-explicit · Adults 18+

BDSM Dating

The practical handbook for meeting kinky partners, online and off

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Dominants the Black Country, Birmingham

I am going to be tedious about safety and I will not be apologising

Posted as tedious_about_safety

Looking for
a submissive who finds carefulness reassuring rather than tiresome
Experience
Fifteen years leading, and a day job that has made me worse about it.
Around
the Black Country, Birmingham

Twenty two years in nursing has shown me exactly what happens when people improvise with things they do not understand. It has made me the least spontaneous dominant you are likely to meet and I have entirely made my peace with that.

Forty four, the Black Country, fifteen years leading, one person at a time and usually for years at a stretch.

In practice this means I will want to know about your health before anything happens, including the parts you find embarrassing and the medication you have privately decided is not relevant. It means I stop things that are going well if something looks wrong to me. It means there are things I will not do at all, however much either of us might want to, because I know precisely what the failure looks like from the other end.

Some people find that clinical, which I understand. Others find it the most relaxing thing they have come across, because it means they can stop being the one keeping an eye on everything, and that is really what I am offering.

Not looking for anybody who wants to be pushed past what they have said. Not looking for anyone who treats a limit as an opening position. And not looking for someone who will decide in month three that I am a killjoy, which has happened, and which I would rather establish now than in September.

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