An independent field handbook · Non-explicit · Adults 18+

BDSM Dating

The practical handbook for meeting kinky partners, online and off

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Couples uptown, Dallas

Eleven first meetings in two years, and we are completely done with that

Posted as no_more_first_meetings

Looking for
one connection, seen regularly, for a very long time
Experience
Together thirteen years, five of them meeting far too many people.
Around
uptown, Dallas

Eleven. We counted. Eleven separate evenings of the same conversation with the same reasonable questions and the same careful politeness, and out of the eleven, two turned into anything and neither lasted.

Thirty nine and forty three, uptown, together thirteen years, five of them with this outside the house. We have concluded that we are simply bad at the meeting part and good at the staying part, and that the sensible response is to stop optimising for the thing we are bad at.

So we are looking for one person, a dominant of any gender, for both of us, seen regularly, for years rather than months. Not a search. Not options. One arrangement that we invest in properly. We are both submissive and that is settled and has been for a decade. We are looking for somebody who can hold two people without it becoming a competition, which we understand is a specific skill and not everybody has it.

What we can offer is unusual stability. We do not disappear, we do not go quiet for a fortnight, and we have never once cancelled on anybody. We can host, our place is private, and we are free most evenings.

Not looking for anyone who wants an evening. Not looking for somebody who will treat two people as twice the fun rather than twice the responsibility. Not looking to do the eleven first meetings again, so if you are also seeing several people, we are not the right fit and there is no judgement in that.

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