I have been the only switch in every group I have ever been in
Posted as only_one_in_room
- Looking for
- other switches, for conversation first and possibly nothing else
- Experience
- Twenty two years, both sides, and a great deal of explaining.
- Around
- Eimsbüttel, Hamburg
Across twenty two years, nobody in any room I have sat in has understood the particular problem of being both. Everybody is friendly. Everybody has a theory about it. Nobody has lived inside it, and after two decades I have run out of patience for explaining the same thing to kind people.
Fifty one, switch, Eimsbüttel, married a long time to somebody who is not in this, who knows about it and does not mind. That part is settled and is not the subject of this post.
What I actually want first is other switches to talk to. Not play. A monthly conversation with two or three people who do not need the premise explained to them. I have tried to start something like this twice and both times it became a general social evening within a month, which was pleasant and not the point.
If something else came of it later I am open to that, and I am not going to pretend I would be disappointed. But the first ask is company rather than a partner and I would rather be honest about the order. I lead and follow in roughly equal measure and have never once been able to predict which in advance.
Not looking for anybody who wants to explain switching to me. Not looking to be part of a group as the interesting exception, which I have been, twice. Not looking for anything that requires me to pick a side in order to be legible to a room.