An independent field handbook · Non-explicit · Adults 18+

BDSM Dating

The practical handbook for meeting kinky partners, online and off

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Switches Eimsbüttel, Hamburg

Finishing in September and staying, which apparently makes me unusual

Posted as staying_after

Looking for
something that can start now rather than after some imagined settling
Experience
Three years, two short dynamics, both with people who left.
Around
Eimsbüttel, Hamburg

Both of the people I have been with here left the city within a year of us meeting. One went home, one went for a job. I have stopped taking it personally and it has made me wary of anyone whose sentences contain the word eventually.

Twenty eight, switch, finishing a degree in September and staying, because I have work lined up and because I like it here, which some people find baffling and which I have given up defending.

What I want is something that begins properly now. Not a summer thing. Not a let us see how it goes while I decide whether this city is for me. I have made my decision about the city and I would like to be with somebody who has made theirs.

I switch and I mean it, though I lean toward leading with people who are new and toward following with people who are not, which I have never fully examined and probably should. I live in a shared flat and cannot host except on the rare weekends when everybody is away. I have very little money and would rather do things that cost nothing, of which this city in summer has plenty.

Not looking for anyone who wants to know what I am doing after my degree, a question I have now answered several hundred times. Not looking for a dynamic that only exists at night. Not looking for somebody who treats a student as temporary by definition, which has happened twice and which I found genuinely insulting.

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