Disabled sub, north London, energy is the thing I plan around
Posted as bench_in_the_park
- Looking for
- someone who plans around a body rather than a fantasy
- Experience
- Seven years, two dynamics, one of them long distance.
- Around
- north of the river, London
I have a chronic condition, I use a stick on most days and a chair on the worst ones, and I can tell you exactly how many minutes of standing I have in me. It is fewer than you would like.
That is the practical fact this whole post is built on. Everything else about me is ordinary. Thirty nine, north of the river, work from home four days out of five, seven years in this and two proper dynamics behind me.
What I need is somebody who treats my energy the way a sensible person treats money: as a real budget, spent on purpose. The dynamics that worked did so because the person asked what a good day and a bad day look like and then built things that fit both. The one that failed did so because he kept planning for the version of me who is fine.
I am not fragile and I do not want to be handled. I want to be told what to do by somebody who has thought about whether I can do it. That is more attentive, not less demanding, and the two people who got it right will tell you I am not an easy option.
Access matters. Stairs are a real answer to a question rather than a detail. I will ask about it early and I would rather you told me plainly. If the disability is the interesting part of this post to you, we are not going to get on.