Everything about our building is designed to stop this being easy
Posted as one_parking_spot
- Looking for
- another couple, dinner first, and nothing arranged in advance
- Experience
- Nine years together, four with this in the marriage, no couples met yet.
- Around
- downtown, Toronto
Our building has one parking spot per unit, a visitor log, a concierge who is genuinely lovely and misses nothing, and walls that keep us informed about the couple next door having a disagreement. Everything about where we live is designed to make this difficult, and we have decided to treat that as a filter rather than a tragedy. Thirty seven and thirty nine, downtown, together nine years, four of them with this in the marriage.
What we are looking for is another couple. Not a third, and we have had that conversation often enough to be certain. Two couples who get on, see each other regularly, and let whatever happens develop at the speed of people who actually like each other.
Being realistic about the practicalities: our place works for four adults having dinner and for nothing beyond that. Anything else would need somebody with more room than we have, or an arrangement neither of us has thought of yet.
We would also say that in our first winter of looking we learned that people will agree to anything in September and cancel everything in January. We are posting in June this time, deliberately.
She leads at home, mostly, and he is enthusiastic about that. Neither of us is looking to change the arrangement. Not looking for a couple where one half is clearly along for the ride. Not looking for anybody who wants to meet just one of us first. Not looking for anything that starts with a plan instead of a dinner.