An independent field handbook · Non-explicit · Adults 18+

BDSM Dating

The practical handbook for meeting kinky partners, online and off

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Submissives the east, Amsterdam

The city is flat and the buildings are not, so access comes first

Posted as built_for_a_goat

Looking for
a dominant who checks a staircase before promising anything
Experience
Twelve years, three dynamics, two of them since the accident.
Around
the east, Amsterdam

This city is completely flat and almost none of it is reachable, which is a joke that nobody who lives here finds funny. The streets are fine. It is the buildings. Four flights of a staircase built at an angle for people who do not exist, with a rope where a handrail ought to be.

Forty one, submissive, in the east, on crutches since an accident four years ago and unlikely to be putting them down. I have a ground floor flat, which took eighteen months and an unreasonable amount of luck, and it means I can host and you almost certainly cannot.

The first conversation with me is about access and I have stopped apologising for opening with it. It does not kill the mood. It is the difference between an evening happening and an evening being abandoned in a doorway while somebody says they had not thought about it.

What I want is fairly ordinary: real authority, a dynamic with structure, and physical control that works with a body which has opinions. I am not asking to be nursed. A partner is not a carer, and if that distinction is fuzzy to you then this will not work.

Not looking for anybody who wants the accident story in the first message. Not looking for someone who says access is no problem without having checked. Not looking to be admired for coping, which I do because the alternative is not coping. And not looking for a dominant who will quietly start planning around me instead of asking, because being managed is the one thing that has genuinely ended something for me before.

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