I work alone at home and I would like to be interrupted
Posted as eleven_words_out_loud
- Looking for
- daily contact and instructions that get me out of the flat
- Experience
- Seven years in this, two of them spent doing nothing about it.
- Around
- Noord, Amsterdam
Yesterday I said eleven words out loud and nine of them were to a delivery driver. I translate for a living, from home, and I have done for six years. The quiet I once thought was the whole point of the job has slowly turned into the thing I need help with.
Thirty eight, submissive, Noord, seven years in and two of them dormant.
What I want is contact and interruption. Somebody who expects to hear from me at a set hour and notices when they do not. Instructions that put me outside: be somewhere by three, walk for an hour, eat something that is not toast. It looks trivial written down. It is not trivial by Thursday.
I am aware that a friend, a dog or a better routine would meet some of this, and I have tried two of the three. What I want on top of it is to answer to somebody and to feel it when I have not. That part I cannot manufacture alone, which is presumably why I am here.
I am calm, I am not fragile, and I will not be messaging you all day. Not looking for anyone who wants one evening a fortnight and nothing in between. Not looking to be a project. Not looking for a person who reads all of this as loneliness, which it partly is, and which is not the same thing as desperation.