An independent field handbook · Non-explicit · Adults 18+

BDSM Dating

The practical handbook for meeting kinky partners, online and off

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Submissives the west, Amsterdam

Born here, gone eight years, and now I need showing round my own city

Posted as local_and_out_of_date

Looking for
a dominant with patience for somebody relearning all of it
Experience
Four years in my twenties, then eight years of nothing.
Around
the west, Amsterdam

I left at twenty five and came back at thirty three, and somewhere in between everybody started saying all of this out loud. When I went, it was a thing you found by accident. Now there are posts describing precisely what somebody wants at nine in the morning and nobody thinks that is remarkable.

Thirty four, submissive, born here, back in the west since last spring after eight years working in Singapore. I did nothing about this while I was away, partly for sensible reasons and mostly because it was easier.

Which puts me in the odd position of being a local who needs showing round. I know which streets flood. I do not know how any of this is conducted now, what people expect, or how fast things are supposed to move. My frame of reference is a decade out of date and consists largely of one bad experience at twenty three.

I want a dominant who is patient with somebody relearning, and something ongoing rather than occasional. I have my own flat, which I understand is the winning card in this city, and I am home most evenings.

Not looking for anybody who is here for a year and then gone, and I say that having been exactly that person myself. Not looking to be hurried towards anything physical in the first month. Not looking for someone who wants to talk about what I earned abroad, which is a conversation I have had far too many times since I got back. What I would like is somebody who has been here the whole time and can tell me what I missed, which sounds like a small thing to want and has turned out to be the main one.

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