I went to one social thing, said about eleven words, and drove home
Posted as eleven_words_and_home
- Looking for
- one person to talk to privately, with nothing public involved ever
- Experience
- Six years of reading, one evening out, and no dynamic yet.
- Around
- Moseley, Birmingham
It took me two years to work up to going and about forty minutes to establish that I would never do it again. Everyone was perfectly nice. I stood near a wall, answered two questions, said something that came out wrong, and left before I had finished my drink. In the car I felt relieved, and then flat for about a week.
Forty three, Moseley, submissive, and apparently constitutionally unsuited to meeting anybody in a group.
So the public route is closed for me and I have stopped pretending it is a matter of trying harder. One person at a time is a different proposition entirely. One person at a time I can talk for hours, in writing or in a quiet room, and I am told I am good company once there is only one of you.
What I want is a dominant content with something completely private. No socials, no groups, nobody else knowing. I understand that reads as secretive, and that the limits which come with it will not suit everybody, which is why it is in the first half of this rather than buried at the bottom.
I have six years of reading behind me and nothing at all in practice, and I would like something ongoing and slow. Not looking for anyone whose plan for me is more exposure, gently applied over time. Two people have tried that and both of them genuinely thought they were helping.