Once a month, both directions, and no relationship around it
Posted as monthly_nothing_else
- Looking for
- an occasional arrangement with somebody whose life is as full as mine
- Experience
- Nine years, mostly occasional, one longer thing that I mishandled.
- Around
- the city centre, Birmingham
My life is completely full. I have work I care about, a family that takes most of what is left, and two friendships I am already failing to maintain properly. What I have spare is roughly one evening a month, and I would rather spend it on this than pretend I can offer more and then quietly not deliver it.
Thirty one, city centre, nine years in and both directions genuine.
I know how that reads on a board where most people want something ongoing. To be clear, I am not offering casual in the sense of careless. I want the same person every month for years, with real trust, real negotiation, and the sort of ease you only get from repetition. I simply do not want it to be a relationship, and I am not going to grow into wanting one.
Both directions, roughly evenly, and I am happy either to alternate or to decide on the night. The person I did this with for three years and I once settled a disagreement about it with a coin, which I still think was the most sensible decision either of us ever made.
Not looking for daily messages. Not looking for somebody who is lonely, because a monthly arrangement is a cruel thing to hand a lonely person and I did that once without meaning to. And not looking to be told I would feel differently about all of this if I met the right person.