Carer at home, so I cannot host and my evenings end at ten
Posted as mother_next_room
- Looking for
- a submissive who can work around a carer's week without resenting it
- Experience
- Fifteen years, three dynamics, one running through the last two years.
- Around
- Eimsbüttel, Hamburg
My mother moved in with me two years ago and she is not going to move out again. That single fact has rewritten how I do all of this, and it is the first thing anybody needs to know rather than the fifth.
Forty four, dominant, Eimsbüttel, fifteen years in. I cannot host, at all, ever. My evenings run from about seven until ten and then I am needed. I get one full afternoon a week when my brother takes over, and one weekend in six.
What I have learned is that a dynamic built around scarcity has to be built differently. Everything that can happen at a distance does: rules, tasks, reporting, long written correction, the sort of daily structure that does not need a room. The time in a room is then used properly rather than spent catching up.
The dynamic I had for the last two years worked exactly that way and ended in March when she took a job in another country. It was a good two years. I would like another. I am dry, organised, and I have a fairly bleak sense of humour about the situation, which upsets some people and which is how I get through it.
Not looking for sympathy about my mother, who is difficult and whom I love. Not looking for anyone who needs me available on a bad night. Not looking for a person who will suggest a care home in the first month, which has happened twice, from people who meant well.