It stopped when she got ill, and I have not started again since
Posted as she_got_ill_it_stopped
- Looking for
- one person, slowly, from somebody out of practice and honest about it
- Experience
- Twenty years, one long dynamic, five years of nothing since.
- Around
- Wirral, Liverpool
We were together eleven years and the structure of it was the best thing in my life. Then she was diagnosed, and within about four months everything we had built quietly stopped being appropriate, and I became a person who drove to appointments and learned about medication. She is fine now, or fine enough. We are not together. Neither of us could work out how to go back to what we had been and we were both too tired to invent something new.
Forty nine, Wirral, dominant man, twenty years in and five of them with nothing at all.
I am out of practice in a specific way. I still know what I want and I am still good at running something. What I have lost is the confidence that I will not be the one who has to stop it again, which is not rational and I am aware of it.
So I am looking for one person and I would like to go slowly. Conversation, a coffee, and no assumption at all about where it is going for a good while.
Not looking for anybody who wants intensity in the first month. Not looking to talk at length about her, though I will answer a fair question. Not looking for a person who wants a dominant with no history, because I have got one and it shows.