Married, open, forty eight, and my wife knows I am posting this
Posted as barometer_k
- Looking for
- one ongoing connection that does not need to become a secret
- Experience
- Sixteen years, most of it within an open marriage.
- Around
- north of the river, London
My wife is not kinky, has no interest in becoming kinky, and has known about all of this since our second year together. She is not part of my search and she will never be part of yours. Those two facts are the whole of my situation and they are not up for renegotiation.
Forty eight, north of the river, sixteen years in this, mostly one connection at a time running alongside a marriage that works. I mention it up front because it goes wrong in two directions. Some people hear married and assume secrecy, which offends me slightly. Others hear open and assume unlimited, which is worse. There is one evening a week and one weekend a quarter, and that is what there is.
Switch, and quite firmly both, depending on the person rather than the mood. What I want is one person, ongoing, for years if it works. Someone who has their own full life and is not looking for it to be filled in by me. That has been the pattern of everything successful I have done, and the two things that failed both failed because somebody wanted more of me than exists, which was not unreasonable of them.
Practically, I am not going to be at your family things and you will not be at mine, and I have found that is easier to say now than to discover at month five when somebody has a birthday. I am steady, I am unusually good at remembering what matters to people, and I am hopeless at pretending to be casual about anything.
If you would need me to hide you, or to be hidden yourself from your own people, we will not work.