Old injury, new limits, and I need somebody who can plan around both
Posted as the_old_injury
- Looking for
- a dominant who treats a bad back as a fact rather than a mood
- Experience
- Nineteen years, and the last four renegotiated from scratch.
- Around
- the east side, Los Angeles
I spent most of my thirties doing physical work on sets and I have the spine of a much older man to show for it. Four years ago a surgery fixed some of it and closed off the rest permanently. Kneeling is out. Anything with my arms above my head is out. Standing still for more than about twenty minutes is out.
Forty seven, the east side, submissive, nineteen years in. I know what I am doing. I simply cannot do a good deal of what I used to, and the last two people I talked to treated that as a challenge to be creatively solved, which was flattering for about a week and exhausting after that.
What still works, and works well: verbal authority, service that uses my hands rather than my back, tasks and standards and being held to them, and long stretches of ordinary time. I am useful around a house. I cook properly. I am extremely good at doing what I am told by somebody I respect.
I would rather be with somebody whose own body has done something unexpected to them, or who has cared for a person whose did. Not for sympathy. That person tends not to hear a limit as an opening bid.
If the interesting part of me is what I used to be able to do, we will both be disappointed, and I would rather you worked that out here than in month three.