I will not take on anyone who has been with a friend of mine
Posted as the_overlap_problem
- Looking for
- a submissive with no history in the small circle I sit in
- Experience
- Eleven years, four dynamics, one of which caused a great deal of trouble.
- Around
- the east of the city, Lyon
Four years ago I began something with a woman who had, eighteen months earlier, been with a close friend of mine. All three of us behaved well. It was still a disaster, because every conversation for a year had a third person somewhere inside it, and the friendship took longer to recover than the dynamic lasted.
Thirty five, dominant, east of the city, eleven years in. Since then I have had a rule, and in a city this size it is genuinely restrictive. I will not take on anybody who has been involved with somebody in my circle. Not out of jealousy. Because I have seen what the overlap does, and because those people are still in my life and will be in ten years.
This means I ask about it early and directly, which some people find intrusive. I would far rather ask in the first conversation than find out in the fourth month.
What I want is a long dynamic with structure. Service, protocol, standing rules, a set evening, correction that is spoken. I am patient, quite strict, and completely uninterested in being known by anybody. I live alone in the east and I can host.
Not looking for anyone who wants to keep a foot in two places. Not looking for a person who thinks the rule is possessive, because it is about the friendship rather than about you. Not looking for anything with somebody who is currently ending something, which in this city means about half the board every September.