I want to lead one person and follow another, in a city this size
Posted as two_people_small_city
- Looking for
- somebody comfortable with an arrangement that is not exclusive
- Experience
- Twenty six years, both sides, and one arrangement that ran in parallel.
- Around
- the 7th, Lyon
The arrangement that suited me best in twenty six years involved two people at once. One I led and one I answered to, both of whom knew about the other, neither of whom ever met. It ran for four years. It also required a level of discretion that is genuinely difficult here, because in this city the two people you are careful to keep apart turn out to have a friend in common.
Fifty one, switch, the 7th. I am trying to build that shape again, slowly, one half at a time, and I am posting about the whole of it rather than presenting a partial version to each person, which is precisely how these things go wrong.
What that means for anybody answering is that you would know in full, from the beginning. You would not have to meet or approve of anybody. If at any point the overlap became uncomfortable I would expect to be told, and the answer would be a conversation rather than a defence.
On the leading side I want protocol and service. On the other side I want structure, rules and a standard I am held to. They are not the same appetite, which is exactly why one person has never quite worked for me.
Not looking for anyone who wants exclusivity, which is entirely reasonable and is not on offer. Not looking for a person who would want names, which will not be given. Not looking for anything with somebody already inside the small circle here, because I am not that reckless.