An independent field handbook · Non-explicit · Adults 18+

BDSM Dating

The practical handbook for meeting kinky partners, online and off

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Switches the northern quarter, Manchester

Switch, twenty seven, and I want something with a bit of fight in it

Posted as best_of_three

Looking for
someone who enjoys the contest rather than a fixed hierarchy
Experience
Four years, mostly with other switches, none of it very formal.
Around
the northern quarter, Manchester

The part I like best is the bit before it is decided. Two people who could both plausibly end up on top, and an evening that could go either way, and neither of us having agreed in advance who is winning. Once it is settled, honestly, I lose interest fairly quickly.

Twenty seven, northern quarter, four years in, and I have never once had a dynamic with a title in it. I work in music, my hours are ridiculous, and I share a flat with two people who are out more than I am. Most of what I have done has been with other switches, which I think is why nobody has ever tried to file me under one heading.

What I want is closer to sparring. Playful, competitive, and completely negotiated beforehand so that the contest is real and nothing about the safety of it is. That part I will not budge on. A proper conversation about limits and signals first, precisely so the rest can be unpredictable.

Not looking for anyone who wants a permanent hierarchy settled in week one. Not looking for someone who is only up for this if they are certain of winning. Not looking to be talked into a service dynamic, which two people have now tried, gently and at length.

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