An independent field handbook · Non-explicit · Adults 18+

BDSM Dating

The practical handbook for meeting kinky partners, online and off

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Couples the northern quarter, Manchester

Open couple with a short list of rules, printed here so nobody guesses

Posted as the_rules_we_have

Looking for
one person for either of us, who is comfortable with the terms
Experience
Together eight years, open for five, several connections between us.
Around
the northern quarter, Manchester

We are going to list our rules rather than describe our personalities, because in five years of doing this the rules are what people actually needed to know and the personalities came across fine on their own.

We each tell the other before anything happens, not afterwards. Neither of us meets anybody at our flat until all three people have met somewhere public. We do not share details we would not say in front of you. Either of us can end anything at any point without a debate, and yes, that has hurt somebody's feelings once and we still would not change it. And nobody becomes a secret.

Thirty four and thirty six, northern quarter, together eight years and open for five. She is a switch, he is submissive, and we are looking separately rather than as a pair. This post is joint because writing two of them felt dishonest.

What we are both after is one ongoing connection each rather than anything occasional. We are quite boring people with quite ordinary jobs.

Not looking for a couple, and not looking for anybody who wants both of us, which is a thing we tried in our second year and were bad at. Not looking for someone who would rather the other one did not exist. Not looking for a person who will find a written list of rules cold, because in our experience it is the people who refuse to write anything down who cause the damage.

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