About four good hours a day, and I would like to spend some here
Posted as energy_budget
- Looking for
- a dominant who hears a cancellation as information rather than rejection
- Experience
- Eight years, three dynamics, the last of them ended amicably in the winter.
- Around
- the near suburbs, Moscow
The illness is chronic, it is managed, it is not going anywhere, and I am not going to name it because the moment I do people start sending me articles. What matters for you is the arithmetic: four good hours on a good day, sometimes two, occasionally none, and I cannot always tell which kind of day it is until about eleven in the morning.
Forty, submissive, the near suburbs, eight years in. I work from home doing editorial work, which is the only reason any of this is possible. Three dynamics. The last one lasted two years and ended well, and the two before it ended over exactly the thing I am writing about now.
Here is what I need and it is honestly not much. When I cancel at short notice, I need that to be received as a fact rather than as a verdict on you. It will happen perhaps once a month. It has never once been about wanting to see somebody less.
What I want in return is real structure. Tasks scaled to what I have, not to what a well person has. Being expected to report honestly, including on the bad days, without the report turning into a conversation about whether I should be doing this at all. I have decided that. It is settled.
Not looking for a carer and not offering to be a patient. Not looking for advice about my health from anybody who does not have it. Not looking for someone who will be very understanding for two months and quietly resentful in the third.