An independent field handbook · Non-explicit · Adults 18+

BDSM Dating

The practical handbook for meeting kinky partners, online and off

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Dominants the near suburbs, Moscow

I have led for six years and never once in the same room

Posted as led_only_in_text

Looking for
a submissive who will let me be a beginner at the physical half
Experience
Six years leading at a distance. Nothing at all in person.
Around
the near suburbs, Moscow

Two long arrangements, both entirely in writing, one lasting three years with somebody several thousand kilometres away whom I never met. I was good at it. I gave structure, I held people to it, I noticed when they were lying to me by the shape of their sentences. None of that is nothing.

But I have never been in a room with anybody while any of it was happening, and I have stopped pretending those are the same skill. Thirty one, the near suburbs, and I have concluded that six years of competence in text does not entitle me to any assumptions about six minutes of competence in person.

So this is an unusual advertisement: an experienced dominant asking to be allowed to be a beginner at a specific part of it. What I would want is somebody who has done this in person, who is comfortable saying stop and expects to have to, and who is not looking for a person who already knows how everything feels.

What I am confident about: authority, consistency, negotiation, noticing things. What I am not confident about: my own hands and my own judgement of how a real body in a real room is doing. I would rather say that here than discover it in front of you.

I am in no hurry and I will move at whatever pace makes the other person feel safe. Not looking for anybody newer than me at the part I am new at. Not looking to be reassured that it will come naturally. Not looking for someone who finds my honesty here disqualifying, though I understand if you do.

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