I want the parts of this that have no equipment in them at all
Posted as the_quiet_half
- Looking for
- a partner interested in authority and attention rather than apparatus
- Experience
- Twelve years, three dynamics, and I have never owned anything.
- Around
- the near suburbs, Moscow
I own nothing. No implements, no restraints, nothing in a cupboard, and after twelve years that is a deliberate position rather than an oversight. Every part of this that has held my attention has been about attention itself: being told, being watched, being expected to, being corrected in a sentence.
Forty three, switch, the near suburbs, twelve years in. I lead about half the time and I find the quiet half easier from the leading side, oddly, because it turns out that giving somebody your entire attention for two hours is harder work than anything you could do with your hands.
What that looks like: kneeling and nothing else happening for a while. Instructions carried out precisely with the other person watching and saying nothing. Long silences that both people understand. Rules about posture and address that are kept when nobody else is in the room. None of it requires a single object and most of it can happen in a kitchen.
I am aware this reads as either very restrained or very strange depending on who is reading. I have had three partners who understood it immediately and a great many conversations with people who kept asking, yes, but then what.
I work in restoration, I am precise about things, I am poor at small talk and fine with silence. Not looking for anybody who is going to suggest, gently, that I try things. Not looking for a shopping conversation. Not looking for someone whose interest here is in the objects, because there is genuinely nothing for you.