Two switches, married, hoping there is another pair of us out there
Posted as both_switches
- Looking for
- another couple who both switch, which we are told is rare
- Experience
- Nine years together, both of us switching throughout.
- Around
- Manhattan, New York
Both of us switch. Between us there are four possible configurations and we have used all of them, sometimes in the same week, which our friends find exhausting even to hear about.
Thirty three and thirty five, Manhattan, married four years, together nine. What we have never managed to find is another couple in the same position. We have met couples with a fixed arrangement and it has never quite worked, because their shape is settled and ours moves, and somebody always ends up accommodating somebody else.
So this is a long shot post. Another couple where both people go both ways, who would enjoy the complexity rather than treating it as a scheduling problem. If you exist, we would like to buy you a coffee and compare notes even if nothing else ever comes of it.
We are sociable, we host well, and we are not remotely intense about any of this. Most of our life is completely normal and we would like it to stay that way.
Not looking for a third. We have tried and it turns out we are simply not good at three. Not looking for anyone who wants to fix a role for the evening before we have met. Not looking for a couple who describe themselves as switch but mean that one of them occasionally allows it, which is the specific disappointment we keep having.