An independent field handbook · Non-explicit · Adults 18+

BDSM Dating

The practical handbook for meeting kinky partners, online and off

Signed out. You are reading, not posting. Log In Sign Up

Dominants the inner city, Sydney

Yes, I am the one in charge. No, the lease does not care

Posted as cannot_host

Looking for
one submissive for something structured that does not need a house
Experience
Five years, all of it arranged somewhere neither of us lived.
Around
the inner city, Sydney

I am a dominant who cannot host, which appears to break something in people's heads. I share a flat in the inner city with two other people because that is what rent is here, and no amount of me being organised and in charge changes the fact that somebody is in the kitchen at all hours.

Thirty one, five years in. I have lost count of the number of times somebody has said but you are the dominant, as though the lease were subject to protocol.

What I have instead is a very high tolerance for planning and no embarrassment about it whatsoever. I will find somewhere. I will arrange it. I am extremely good at making something feel unhurried and inevitable in a place neither of us lives, and it is a skill I would never have developed if I had a house.

What I want is one submissive, long term, for something structured and demanding. I like protocol and rules that run through the week. Most of what I do is not physical at all, which helps considerably given the circumstances.

Not looking for anybody who wants me to be older and wealthier than I am, which is a specific fantasy I have run into a great deal. Not looking for somebody who only wants to be led at their place on their terms. Not looking to be told to get my own place, which I am aware of, thank you, and am working on.

Reply to this post Replies go through your account, not this page. Nothing you send is published here.

Before you answer this

The handbook covers the part that comes next. These three are the ones that matter to a post like this one.

Also in Sydney

All posts in Sydney →

You have read one. Now write one.

Write a post like this where the people reading it are near you, and answer the ones that are already there.

Write your post Already a member? Log in