An independent field handbook · Non-explicit · Adults 18+

BDSM Dating

The practical handbook for meeting kinky partners, online and off

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Dominants downtown, Toronto

My rules are written for the days we cannot see each other

Posted as when_it_snows

Looking for
a submissive who wants a dynamic rather than a series of evenings
Experience
Ten years, two long dynamics, both of them highly organised.
Around
downtown, Toronto

Half of what I do is designed for the days we cannot be in the same room, because in this city there are a great many of them and pretending otherwise builds something that collapses every January.

Thirty seven, downtown, dominant, ten years. What that looks like in practice: a set of standing rules that do not require my presence, a check in that happens daily whatever else is going on, and a short list of things that change when a day is cancelled, rather than the day simply being lost. Somebody once described it as having a bad weather timetable, which is exactly right, and I have used the phrase ever since.

I am telling you this first because it is the most useful thing about me and it is deeply unromantic. I am organised. I write things down. I remember what you told me in March.

What I am looking for is a submissive who wants a dynamic rather than a series of evenings. Somebody who finds a structure steadying rather than restrictive, and who is honest when they have not managed something, because the reporting is the entire mechanism and a person who fails quietly and says nothing breaks it completely.

I live alone downtown and can host, though the walls are what they are. Not looking for a scene partner. Not looking for anybody who goes quiet for a fortnight and reappears without mentioning it. Not looking for somebody who wants to be surprised, because I will always tell you the plan.

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